Joy Unspeakable

The sun is shining but the air is cool and crisp. Spring can’t quite seem to displace winter. Everyone, including myself, is eager for spring to settle in une fois pour toutes.

For the past few days I’ve been battling a cold. Scratchy throat. Heavy head. Blocked nasal passage. I’m ready for this cold to go away. I’m ready to feel normal again. Despite the coolness of the day and the fact that I’m not exactly feeling 100%, I went for a run this afternoon. I wanted to “sweat” the cold out of me. I’m not sure it worked, but at least the run felt good.

Running this afternoon along Toronto’s waterfront made everything seem real — that I am actually here, slowly putting down roots … finally coming into myself. It’s a combination of things. Returning to a regular writing schedule. Daily walks to the grocery store on Queen Street West. Savouring my Redeye at Spot, the neighbourhour café. Spending my afternoons cooking on my days off. Running in a city with few hills (unlike Sherbrooke!). Reconnecting with old friends.

There’s a good ebb and flow to my life, a sign that something’s shifted. And for the better! I can’t necessarily name that change, but it’s intoxicating (in a good way). There is, within me, a joy unspeakable. And that feels great.